She Keeps On, Keeping On

Back in February I mentioned an adored friend started her battle against breast cancer. Last week she finished her final session of chemotherapy.

In between chemo sessions there were moments that she was herself, and a couple of days after she took to bed, which was soooo not herself.

She shared how the chemo triggered her senses. She tasted metal in her mouth and her pee smelled chemically. She also talked about the pain, and that she hated pain killers, because it robbed her of a day from being out and about. If you know her, you would know she likes to be out and about. Many a brunches with her were cancelled

I gagged. I then got over myself. I gave love, humor, tempered the sharing of my own drama, and always left her with encouraging words.

She gave me back her love, humor and tempered it with an honesty about what she was going through. Most women know how to do that because, as Renee said once, they have vaginas and are not scared of the details. A lot of men shut down and become boys when facing drama.

My dear friend rocked some fab wigs while experiencing chemo. My favorite was this asymetrical bob with purple highlights on the tips. She gave you Latina Jem and I hope I was her hologram. She is truly outrageous.

I kinda battled with past, present and future tense in writing this post. Perhaps my confusion is connected to my thoughts about whether her fight is finally won. She will win. She is winning. She has won.

She is here!

So, fuck the tenses, because I know you knew that I meant we are in the knowing while in the now.